How does this relate to racing?
I have been thinking about this a lot lately, as I have pondered over past races, over how I behave now as a runner, and how I view myself as a triathlete. When I first started running I lacked confidence. I set low expectations, and was paralyzed by the desire to flee. (Research has shown that women have a tendency to flee - escape, turn to others for help, diffuse the situation - while males tend to fight-respond with aggression). I have worked hard at this over the years, and I can now, for the most part, push the "flee demons" away, channel my aggression, and race hard. It is much harder for me to do this in triathlon. I am still very intimidated. I need to work much harder for my inner aggressor. But I tend to find it, usually. I remember how terrified I was of the HIM swim last summer, and how I rehearsed being aggressive in the water; i ended up having a great swim, and no terror, which was rare for me last year.
So my point is, if you have a tendency to flee, if you get intimidated in races, try to channel your inner aggressor. It is quite amazing the difference that can make. Women tend to have a hard time with aggression, we are socialized to be nice, but if being nice is something that is important to you, be nice after the race. During the race, be aggressive and use the adrenaline to fuel your speed!
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My knees are doing better. I look like I got a beating, but I am fine. I had a great 50+ mile bike ride this morning followed by an awesome 5 miler run and mile swim. I looked rather frightening with one of my knees purple and double the size of the other one, but I did not care. I had no pain, so I was happy! So mom, yes, I really am FINE!
18 comments:
Hi R&L,
Thanks for the comment on your blog. Your post is interesting - makes me think of my race today. I was trying to catch this woman the whole way, caught her at 3.5 km, she tried to hold me off, we dueled it out, grunting, sweating, clearly trying to shake each other; aggressive one might say. I finally dropped her with 500 m to go. When she crossed the line, we exchanged a mutually initiated BIG hug and a handshake - this to me is the epitome of great female racing: competitive fire while out there on the road/track (pool/lake) but camaraderie/support/friendship immediately afterwards.
I love it that you put both your PBs and your goals on the side of your blog. Great idea.
I used to live in the Boston area - so many great races to chose from. Where do you think you'll break 19? Have you picked a certain race where you are going to go for it?
PPC
I'm glad your knees are doing better!
This post was great! I remember during one tri, I was determined not to panic in the water. AND, I was so tired of being swum over, that I made up my mind to be more aggressive in the water! It worked! Whenever I felt someone grabbing my ankles, I would kick as hard as I could to get them off of me! I know it sounds kind of mean, but it's what I had to do. I definitely channeled my inner aggressiveness in that race!
Aimee, I did the same thing - if someone hit me, I hit back. I was back being nice once the race was over (LOL)
This is great! So true and such a MAJOR help to me yesterday. The flight/fight in regards to men and women also so true. My husband-aggressive-all fight very little fear-even if he has nothing to back it. I can train harder and harder and run more and more miles but still struggle with the desire to "flee"-run the race as a training run, don't taper, save my legs, be careful as not to injure bullsh*t etc.....
It IS empowering to fight!!!!
I am So famous for being nice. I'm always nice. I am dead serious that I have held up from passing someone in the finish chute because I thought it might come across as rude. My GOD, it's a race. Let it go....
Anyhooooo-great info here! I found it very helpful! Again, you are a great resource. I appreciate your knowledge, your abilities, your encouraging nature!
50 miles-5 miles-1 mile on a beaten broken body! SERIOUSLY! I'm a total lazy butt today and I've accomplished a 4 minute weight training session and 3 hours on the computer! So productive! Hope you are in bed with an ice pack! Thanks again AM:)
This is so useful and truly inspirational to me. I will tuck this one away! Thank you for your wisdom. You have a gift AM..you are wise and you help many people! I remember in high school I was racing the 800m in regionals and my teammate was expected to win. I surprised myself and started to pick up. I realized that I was about to win at the end but couldn't beat her...I finished in 2:30 just shy of 2:29 and we crossed nearly together but she got the title. I wish I would have had a bit more fight in me!! :) I'm learning!
I completely agree with this. It took me years to find my confidence, but once I did, my racing changed for the better. I can tell the week leading up to a race how it will go on how I am feeling in the confidence department. The power of the mind never ceases to amaze.
I love that your mom still worries about your boo boos.
Another great introspective post.
I'm definitely a fight person. I've always been. If I flee, then it probably wasnt' worth my time in the first place. In fact, I should probably flee more often because often it isn't worth it. But in racing....it's different. I fight others, but probalby flee from the most important person - ME. Must work on that.
poor knees, glad they are feeling ok overall.
only recently did I start to dig in to this inner I can push through it kind of mentality...wow what a difference!
You bring up a fascinating point about the mental side of racing. I definitely think I perform differently depending on how I approach a race.
oh my gosh, purple knee?! Be careful!!!
Glad your knees are doing OK! I have been having trepidation over racing pretty much since NYC (/when I first got 'sick'). I know I "fled" from gunning for it again for awhile, but I think I am coming back to my old self at last! Thanks for your encouraging comments (I was a little confused at first by Chris, lol). You are a huge motivator to me at how tough you are!
I think this is really sound advice. When I am feeling really bad during a race the best way to get out of it is to get mad. I am, in general, a very calm person and it is an unnatural reaction. That being said, i do know it works. Take care and best of luck.
Hi!
this is a great topic and post. I feel like there could be a whole book on this topic for us ladies and competition.
bottom line: it's okay to be aggressive out there. I'm still on the learning path for this, but I think I've come a long way...;-)
Great post, AM! I know I get so worked up over a marathon and many times think about fleeing, but once I'm out there I tend to fight for what I know I worked hard for!
On the opposite end of that...I'm tired of fighting this foot and looking forward to a little flee time; I think it's going to be the "Therapy" I need for awhile :).
Thanks for the nice comment today, Chris. Hehe.
Sometimes I wonder which way I lean, the fight or the flight. Then something will happen and I come back to the realization that I almost always fight. Even when I'm scared. I was in Rome with my gram after I graduated from college and her purse wasn't zippered. We were in a crowd of people, and I thought I saw a woman stick her hand in my gram's purse. I wasn't positive. It was very crowded. It happened really fast. Without thinking I grabbed the lady and confronted her. She immediately backed off and disappeared into the crowd...I just reacted. No thinking at all. I often shock people that way. I'm nice enough as long as I don't feel threatened. Once I'm threatened, I become extremely aggressive. It surprises people. I don't know what that means for my racing. My racing now is more about me racing me. It's more like meditation. I do get nervous for races, but it's an excited feeling. I guess I usually associate the fight or flight with feeling scared or threatened...very interesting post...
So, I don't know if you've seen The Black Swan yet but it reminds me so much of your post. On one hand the pressure can make us flee but I tend to get determined and aggressive inside. In the movie, it almost seemed like an evil characteristic, to fight, but it certainly brought about the character's strongest performance, which didn't result in a happy ending! I don't want to spoil it for you but you should see it!
I didn't love this movie but I did see a lot of correlations to running and athletics in general. I actually bought it for our pre-marathon movie day!!!
Certain sports require a little bit of fighting, I think triathlon is one of them, especially the swim event. At the beginning I sometimes want to flee but once the gun goes off it's time to fight.
Good to hear your knee is getting better.
I often wonder about this, but in a kind of backwards sort of way. My whole life as an athlete has been "fight", never back down, give it everything you've got, don't settle for second best. This was most apparent when I studied martial arts. Every fight, really was a fight, every competition I had to be the best and often was.
These days, I still have some fight in me, but I also have some flight. I feel tired of fighting sometimes, I just want to 'do' it. I guess it's why I hate races so much. I like the training, but loathe racing. I guess I used up most of my fight in my youth, I'm retired now ;)
This is a great post! In the weeks leading up to a race, I try to envision myself meeting and surpassing my goals. It helps me feel powerful and I think it prepares me to get into that "fight" mentality on race day.
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